Healing our own traumas and parenting wounds before becoming a parent is the best way to break this cycle. It allows us to become more self-aware and conscious of our own behaviour patterns. We can learn to recognise when we are reacting out of our own traumas rather than responding to the needs of our children.

There are many ways to heal our own traumas and parenting wounds. Somatic Therapy is a great place to start. A good SE therapist can help us explore our past experiences and learn new coping mechanisms via feeling within your body and learning to be aware of what comes up when you feel. We can also try meditation, yoga, EMDR, EFT Tapping or other mindfulness practices that can help us become more grounded and present in the moment.

Another important aspect of healing our own parenting wounds is to practice self-compassion. We need to learn to be kind and gentle with ourselves, especially when we make mistakes as parents. We can’t expect to be perfect all the time, but we can strive to do better and be better.

In short, no mum is truly prepared for motherhood. We can read all the books, attend all the classes, and talk to all the other parents we know, but we will still face challenges that we never expected. However, by healing our own traumas and parenting wounds before becoming a parent, we can become more self-aware and conscious of our own behaviour patterns. This will allow us to be more present and responsive to the needs of our children, and break the cycle of intergenerational trauma.